I won't lie. Part of me was petrified to return to work. Afraid to work alongside others who obviously were ten times the professional I ever was, afraid to face the big-bad-copy-scanning-fax machine, afraid to answer the phone for fear of saying the wrong thing.
Of course, I answered the phone, and I said the wrong thing. Twice. And I biffed like six things on copy machine, and everyone knew more than me and turned out to be ten times the professional I am.
Yet, I continued to enter the office, and I continued to get things...right. I happened to know a thing or two about a thing or two. I became a bit more comfortable on the phone. I also developed something of a routine and, well, even began to enjoy it.
New tasks emerged. I had to teach myself a few things, and I will need to teach myself a thousand more. But, I have a reasonable expectation for the ebb and flow of the day. I know I am working with good people. I'm assured that what I bring to the table is of some value, and I am ultimately confident that this is a "good fit", hopefully for a fair amount of time to come.
All that being said, I've learned a great deal since starting this new gig, but the most powerful lesson I've learned is that one's perception of his or her job defines much of one's working experience. When you are terrified of the phone or the assignments or the technical jargon or the computer systems, every task is daunting, every minute is slow, and in the end, the entirety of the job is just an ongoing, exhausting nightmare. I know, because I've had those jobs in the past.
But I am excited to say that I do not have one of those jobs at present. No. Lord-willing, I can do this, and I am very grateful to him for that.
And I am also very thankful to all of you for your encouragement and support over the last several weeks as I have prepared for this next step. Your kind words and prayers have been integral to my successfully returning to the financial workforce, and I hope that the Lord rewards you immensely for the blessing you have been to me. Here's to you all having a great weekend!
Thank you all,